Getting back at it

There's nothing like watching the movies you love to get yourself back into the gear you believe is the right gear. So yesterday evening I spent with the movies I love.

The cinemactic evening was inaugerated with Almodovar's "Talk to her" that took me to that deep dark place, that I'm sure Almodovar knows quite well. After that it was "Cinema Paradiso", that little Italian treat. Followed that up with helping Alina out in the kitchen with a Pakistanized version of some Italian dish (not trying to hog any credit, basically I just blended boiled potatoes in milk with lots of black pepper and salt). And if you think that was enough, after stuffing myself to the point of resembling a boiled potato, I ended the night with a very late night showing of "Amelie"! Alina saw the film for the first time, so I kept nagging her about how lovely Audrey Totou and every frame of the movie is, I'm sure there was a moment where she would have preferred to smack me with a pillow case stuffed with horse shoes...

So today, sitting at my office enjoying my morning cup of tea, I can sit and just write at lesiure, ahh that lovely feeling.

Yesterday was an interesting day. Work was busier then usual, that means I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown (reminds me of another Almodovar film), the sky was filled with clouds and not a single drop of rain fell, and the evevning saw the spell of rain come to an inevitble end. And I came across a random blog that I really liked.

I've always felt that a blog should be the reflection of the everyday ordinary life, whish is just so special. But it should be more in the head then out there in the physical world. I don't really know if I'm making much sense, but at least I know what I'm talking about, so bear with it. It was a blog by an aspiring writer caught up in the hassles of London, and keeping up with the crazed traffic. Somehow I got to reading the posts and kept getting hooked on them.

Would it make sense if I say that I can actually be that same person in a different situation / life? Well the posts gave me that sort of a feeling. Specially there was one post written in the wake of the heart wrenching London bomb blasts. Without permission of the author, I'm going to reproduce a small portion that really made sense to me.

You see, people who live in London are like cockroaches, tough, mean, survivalists.
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Using this word 'freedom' over and over again as if it meant something. I decided this word freedom that we are supposed to be defending is actually a mistake, it should be 'wealth' or 'money' because that is what the rest of the world is pissed off about really. It is power games isn't it? The fight for power, because no one is really free when there are governments that do not represent the will of the people. DOesn't the world want less carbon gases in the environment? Does Bush change his policies? Is he reallly concerned about his 'economy' or his own ties to oil companies and profit?
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Everyone was chatting, undeniably calm, smiling, happy to be alive.
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'Freedom' wasn't something we felt because we were western, but because we were happy to be alive, anywhere, even if were in the Middle East. None of us felt the democracy, because how can we be democratic when our media manipulates the way we think? I kept thinking that terrorism wouldn't survive without the media, and vice versa, a sort of paristical relationship.
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I don't blame the terrrorists for their anger. The middle east has a lot to be pissed off about. Hell, a lot of the world does because of the West. Look at Africa, South America. But I do feel that everyone is one, and that we cant see each other as enemies, as others trying to take away our 'freedom' because as we all know 'freedom' is only a buzzword, an illusionary thing that the 'other' is trying to steal because we want to see them as the enemy. There is no enemy, only ourselves to blame. As Janis Joplin sang 'freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose'.

I'd say I feel exactly the same about the situation, except I'd go on to say that I don't blame the terrorists for their anger, but I do hold them responsible for the ways they employ to vent it. Getting even with a baby in a pram is just never going to be justified in any way or for to me. But the "one"ness of everyone, yes! Why is it so difficult for us to accept that, and rejoice in the thought. I guess the reason would always lie somewhere in-between the differences in faith and belief. Freedom has actually become just a buzzword. It's like a million flies buzzing it without really knowing why they're doing what they're doing or what they expect to convey.

Why is it that the more progress we make in-terms of getting to know things, we move farther and farther away from the simplest of truth? Why do we keep losing our hold on rationality? Why do we keep getting automated into strips of program to be run?

But I'd always be hopeful, cause I feel there is hope, that's why we still exist, cause the day we stop existing would be the day hope would end.

Next time...